For the 1st time in my life, I am to make a decision that will decide my very future. This is the kind of decision that will make or break a person as well as the people around him. I haven't faced a problem of this magnitude before, but I need to make a choice, and this choice is going to affect a lot of people in a lot of different ways. I'm at this moment trying my best to keep my head as clear and as logical as I possibly can, and this problem has left me tossing and turning in my bed for a long time.
What does one do, when the 2 choices one is presented with is equally important, the life changing type of important. I have tried weighing the options, both of them are what I value at heart. I have also considered every situational outcome of these 2 choices, and I simply cannot make the best out of these 2 options. No matter how long have I thought this out, I have arrived to the same conclusion.
Whichever decision that I make, I would have to sacrifice something great in return. No one said life is ever going to be easy, but this problem really has left me at a loss. My logic is telling me to take one decision, but my feelings are telling me to take the other. The worst part is, neither of the choices are wrong. Both of them are right in their very own ways.
As of now, my feelings are outweighing my logic and my decision is leaning that way. That said, I am still at a loss. If I do follow my feelings there will be a whole load of shit down the road, and I really need to be ready for that. I need to brace myself for what's to come, and it's not going to be pretty.
My father approached me today morning. He noticed the way I'm leaning to now and he told me this, "I really am not against you leaning that way, but please do consider this. If you go down this road, it will get really complicated. I am not telling you what to do, but you really have to think about this."
Jono if u're reading this, please contact me on msn as soon as possible. I'll fill you in on the details. I have already let all the involved parties know, including May and Kit, and being part of the family you deserve to know too. You can call home if u want to, but please ask specifically for me if you do. This is something extremely private and it's better that I tell you myself.
