Unlucky

I can only guess that my unlucky streak is coming back to haunt me again...the -R.V- match is a complete failure for my team...and I participated in it cuz one of our initial participants weren't being his usual self that day...Oh well...we lost...that aside...

I have to spend one freaking semester studying ONE freaking subject...

Yes...I guess that's how my college gets money...geez...they aren't allowing me to bring up my last subject so I could move on the year 1...so that's how it is...

Furthermore...today...I went to the arcades again...for the fun of playing...BUT...things aren't really going as I expect...I was so off-form today that I can't even do a clean run in any course...I'm crashing so much that it's not even funny anymore...O_o I guess I'm really having bad luck lately...

I just hope that this doesn't goes on for a long time like how it did during the period in high skool when I broke my ankle...-_-

Penang trip and sem start...

So I went to a poorly planned penang trip with wz, zh and kenneth...and that's just sad...yes...sad...We spent most of our time driving around...will not go into details since it's a VERY long story...but going on a nearly pointless road trip is still way better than staying home my whole holidays...

And my exam results are out by the way...I miraculously passed the 2 subjects that I think I would fail and filed the one subject that I think I don't have any problems with...-.- I guess luck really isn't on my side...but then again I worked my ass off for the other 2 so I guess I deserve passing those...and kinda neglected the one that I failed...Well either way 2/1 is a good thing...

But the thing is...I just went to my head of skool and asked if I could bring up the last subject to year one and complete it...I mean...spending 1 sem on ONE subject isn't really what's on my mind...I'll have too much free time...and I have to pay for another sem...well not exactly I pay...more like my father's paying...I don't really like to waste his money either...

Then again I told my dad if I couldn't get through last sem I would go out and look for work instead of going to another college...But I just can't accept this......'defeat'...... I can't find a better word cuz this is really the closest word to how I feel now...once again my stupidity made me fall into a hole...a very deep one this time...I can only hope my father will give me this one chance to do it...

Speaking of another matter...this Friday the 9th of May will be team -R.V- 's 1st team competition...I have some good expectations from this team...my team...we seek to prove that playing less doesn't mean we're inferior...and that we are indeed a team to be feared...then again the chances of us winning in this is slim...but if I were to participate (which I'm not going to since the team has made it's decision on who's to go) I would give it all I have no questions asked cuz it's not just about me anymore...If I go down...the whole team goes down with me...Best of lcuk to Kenji and Dominic who will be on the front line...I'll be around Mid Valley to cheer on my team though...and of course...we'll have our long overdue 2nd team gathering...nothing much really...just having dinner and stuff...

On a separate note...When can I finally have my paint ball game???!!!-.-"

PC fair and Pink Lady's B'day celebration...

So I finally got my new PC...but for the time being it's still in parts and now I'm currently at Wz's house putting it together...and blogging too lol...

So here goes me starting the day off asking money from my dad for the new CPU yesterday morning...Not exactly a good start but heck it's the last day of PC fair and bargains are everywhere...and IF you're lucky you might get some free goodies too...heck I even heard a buy 1 free 2 offer for webcams...sounds ridiculous but that's what I heard...

I managed to ask WZ and Kenji out and follow me to the PC fair cuz my knowledge about computers are half baked at best...So it's better that I bring these 2 along...At least like that I'll have an idea what I should buy next time and stuff...

So we shoppped for my stuff for like 2 hours or so...and I actually got most of my stuff at only ONE booth...yes...one...PC fair is that stupid...You'll have to walk through the whole convention just for a friggin pendrive...

So anyhow...After walking around the PC fair for 2 hours...we finally got out and dumped the stuffs into my car...then we went yum cha abit....and walked over to Sungei Wang so WZ could get a B'day present for his girlfriend Hiao Seng AKA the Pink Lady ( she's obsessed with pink )...After another hour of walking around...WZ's got a bouquet of flowers with 2 lil teddy bears in the middle of it and another stuffed dog for his girlfriend...cute

We met with the rest of the gang later and I made 2 new friends...Ederine...A crazy girl that is truly crazy and Aaron Chen...A 24 year old that will be flying to the USA to further his studies at the end of next month...they both are quite nice to talk to...and the funny thing is...Ederine is actually Kenji's former skool mate...and Ederine's friend kinda have a crush on him...XD so me and WZ was like....WOOOOOT~ lolololol

Well the day is quite tiring...and I'm having this migraine almost the whole day...that sucked really bad though...-.-

Fate?

So it was me again who gave in to my own weaknesses...Yes...somehow I just can't stand life without her and got in touch with her again...

Well she was as clueless as usual about what's going on with me...but we were still able to work out our differences...so guess what? we're friends again...no surprise there...

What's surprising was this actually...Just about a week after we were in touch with each other again...she suddenly called me out of the blue...yes....for no apparent reason...just so say hi she said...but yea...I was so happy she called that I actually can't continue on my afternoon nap...not that I don't want to...just that I'm too happy to feel tired anymore...

Then later at night...I wasn't really in the mood to study nor watch TV...nor getting my ass to a nearby cyber cafe to have internet access...I decided to go to Times Square and Sungei Wang to brush up my skills on my favorite arcade racing game...I was in Times Square for about 45 minutes before I went over to Sungei Wang...

So I was planning to go to the arcade at the 2nd floor...I walked to SW from TS and got into an elevator...the arcade is on the second floor...but the buttons in the elevator are all smudged and all...I just pushed the on that SEEMS like 2 to me...when I got out of the elevator...I looked around and found myself kinda lost...I thought I'm on the second floor...but I was actually on the ground floor...

So I was kinda lost and all...walking around...not really sure which floor I'm in...then she called...and guess what? She saw me walking around without a clue where I'm at...-.- so she called me over to join her at a nearby restaurant with her bf...I usually find it really hard to refuse whatever she asks of me so I agreed...

Going to the restaurant she said she's in itself was really challenging in a sense...I mean...I haven't seen her for 5 months or so...and I was really really nervous...

YES...I ADMIT I'M REALLY SHY FOR A GUY
but that's me...nothing I can really do about it...: \

The moment I saw her is really the best thing that happened to me for the last few months...I was really shy and probably blushing and all...I FELT SO EMBARRASSED...but deep down inside...I was really really happy to have ran into her that day...after all that blundering she had to be there where I don't plan to be yet ended up being...

I guess this is what they call fate...

Memories

I was in class...trying concentrate on what the lecturer is saying...but the projector isn't working so it's kinda boring...so I decided to sent a msg to my friend and see if we could chat a little...

There I was...thinking I was keying in my friend's number...and before I knew it...Rowena's number was in the 'send to:' spot...I shook it off...and tried to key in my friend's number again...the same thing happened...

I don't know what's happening...I don't even know what I was doing until I finished typing her numbers...I didn't even noticed until the last second...

That really ruined my otherwise ordinarily boring day...

I miss her...it's only been more or less a month since I told myself I don't wanna have anything to do with her anymore...and it feels like it's been half a year...I miss her badly...but the missing ends here...all I'll ever do is miss her...I will not break the ice no more...I'm sick of it...

The best way to describe my feelings are probably these...

I've put my trust in you,
Pushed as far as I can go,
and for all this,
There's only one thing you should know.
I've tried so hard, and got so far,
But in the end, it doesn't even matter,
I had to fall to lose it all,
But in the end,
IT DOESN'T EVEN MATTER

Fix you

When you try your best but you don't succeed,
When you get what you want but not what you need,
When you feel so tired but you can't sleep,
Stuck in reverse.

And the tears come streaming down your face,
When you lose something you can't replace,
When you love someone but it goes to waste,
Could it be worse?

Lights will guide you home,
and ignite your bones,
and I will try to fix you.

And high up above or down below,
When you're too in love to let it go,
But if you never try then you'll never know,
Just what you're worth.

Lights will guide you home,
and ignite your bones,
and I will try to fix you.

Tears stream, down your face,
When you lose something you cannot replace,
Tears stream, down your face and ahhhh...

Tears stream, down your face,
I promise you I will learn from my mistakes,
Tears stream, down your face and ahhhh...

Lights will guide you home,
and ignite your bones,
and I will try to fix you.

Disappointed

So I guess this is really just my luck...That everytime I fall in love...I had to fall out of love the most heart-breaking way anyone can possibly imagine...It's so sad and pathetic that I don't even want to say it a second time...

This is kinda the 1st time I ever felt this way about anyone...that bitter-sweetness that is so hard to let go of...that always breaks my heart one way or the other...and someway somehow...she would always do something that makes me weak and keep hanging on to her...

Well I'm sick of it...so sick and tired of it...I don't care anymore...Forgetting that she's probably the best and worst thing that has ever happened to me is not going to be easy but I don't care anymore...This is torture...I just can't take it anymore...This is really Goodbye

I really wish I could just talk to her one last time...just so I could hear her sweet voice and watch that beautiful smile of hers...I miss her greatly...but in the end...

What's The Point?